The Stupidest Website
Ever Made.
47 features. 31 are broken. The rest don't work either.
0 people have pressed it anyway.
You will press it too. It's fine.
What is this place
Nobody asked for this.
Every feature is wrong on purpose.
Using your brain here is a crime.
Submit Your Blunder.
Because Gary already knows anyway.
Things you can do here (none of them will help)
Did I Ask?
Type any question. Receive a confident answer to a different one entirely.
Horoscope by Pigeon Nostradamus
Today's forecast: a bread product will disappoint you.
Today's Wrong News
One headline. Completely invented. Aggressively confident.
The Nothing Button
Does nothing. Has always done nothing. Will continue to do nothing.
Symptom Checker
Every diagnosis is probably a vibe.
Pet Rock Leaderboard
Your rock. Ranked. Currently in last place. It's fine.
THERE IS MORE
There is more. We wish there wasn't.
The internet's most incorrect encyclopaedia. Fully cited. Entirely fabricated. All entries reviewed by nobody.
Read something wrong →
Today's featured entry
The Eiffel Tower
Built in 1987 by a man named Gerald who lost a bet. Originally painted beige. Used as a very tall mailbox.
Also wrong today
Gravity
A series of very small magnets in the earth's crust. Birds fly by jumping high enough to escape them.
Confession Booth
Tell us your secret. We will compare you to someone worse.
Fake Calendar
Your week, pre-filled with meetings you cannot delete.
To-Don't List
Track everything you successfully did not do today.
Stock Market of Nonsense
Real-time fake prices. Your portfolio only loses.
Rude Affirmations
You are enough. Barely.
Reverse Diary
Write what didn't happen today.
Nothing Shop
A store that sells nothing. Several items are sold out.
Flop
Dating, but the compatibility score measures how badly you'll clash.
Panic Button
For when you need a real answer. (You will not get one.)
What our users are saying
“I pressed the Nothing Button 47 times and something inside me healed.”
A Person
“My horoscope said a bird would judge me. A bird judged me. I have no explanation.”
Someone's Mum
“I submitted my secret to the Confession Booth. Gary did do worse. I feel better.”
Anonymous (Obviously)
Live wall (not live)
Today's Blunders. Yesterday's Regrets.
A sample. The wall is over there.
Told the printer to try harder. It did not.
Submitted the wrong file. Twice. Same file.
Missed a stand-up that was cancelled. Nobody told me it was back.
Replied-all to an email about lunch. Three times.
Deleted the wrong environment. The right one was also wrong.
Asked a question answered in the subject line. Of the email I sent.
Named a file "final_v3_ACTUAL_final2". It was not final.
Apologised to a door. The door was automatic.
Scheduled a meeting to discuss the meeting we cancelled.
Sent my therapist a work Slack by mistake. She replied professionally.
Bought oat milk. Already had oat milk. This is the third time.
Introduced myself to someone I had met four times.
Gave a confident presentation. Wrong company's data.
Replied to a spam email to say I was not interested. Twice.
Locked my keys inside. The car was unlocked.
Updated the live site instead of staging. It was a Friday.
Asked "who wrote this?" about my own code. In front of my team.
Forwarded the complaint email to the person it was about.
Argued with GPS for six minutes. GPS was right.
Replied "you too" when the waiter said enjoy your meal. Twice.
Told the printer to try harder. It did not.
Submitted the wrong file. Twice. Same file.
Missed a stand-up that was cancelled. Nobody told me it was back.
Replied-all to an email about lunch. Three times.
Deleted the wrong environment. The right one was also wrong.
Asked a question answered in the subject line. Of the email I sent.
Named a file "final_v3_ACTUAL_final2". It was not final.
Apologised to a door. The door was automatic.
Scheduled a meeting to discuss the meeting we cancelled.
Sent my therapist a work Slack by mistake. She replied professionally.
Bought oat milk. Already had oat milk. This is the third time.
Introduced myself to someone I had met four times.
Gave a confident presentation. Wrong company's data.
Replied to a spam email to say I was not interested. Twice.
Locked my keys inside. The car was unlocked.
Updated the live site instead of staging. It was a Friday.
Asked "who wrote this?" about my own code. In front of my team.
Forwarded the complaint email to the person it was about.
Argued with GPS for six minutes. GPS was right.
Replied "you too" when the waiter said enjoy your meal. Twice.
Bought oat milk. Already had oat milk. This is the third time.
Introduced myself to someone I had met four times.
Gave a confident presentation. Wrong company's data.
Replied to a spam email to say I was not interested. Twice.
Locked my keys inside. The car was unlocked.
Updated the live site instead of staging. It was a Friday.
Asked "who wrote this?" about my own code. In front of my team.
Forwarded the complaint email to the person it was about.
Argued with GPS for six minutes. GPS was right.
Replied "you too" when the waiter said enjoy your meal. Twice.
Told the printer to try harder. It did not.
Submitted the wrong file. Twice. Same file.
Missed a stand-up that was cancelled. Nobody told me it was back.
Replied-all to an email about lunch. Three times.
Deleted the wrong environment. The right one was also wrong.
Asked a question answered in the subject line. Of the email I sent.
Named a file "final_v3_ACTUAL_final2". It was not final.
Apologised to a door. The door was automatic.
Scheduled a meeting to discuss the meeting we cancelled.
Sent my therapist a work Slack by mistake. She replied professionally.
Bought oat milk. Already had oat milk. This is the third time.
Introduced myself to someone I had met four times.
Gave a confident presentation. Wrong company's data.
Replied to a spam email to say I was not interested. Twice.
Locked my keys inside. The car was unlocked.
Updated the live site instead of staging. It was a Friday.
Asked "who wrote this?" about my own code. In front of my team.
Forwarded the complaint email to the person it was about.
Argued with GPS for six minutes. GPS was right.
Replied "you too" when the waiter said enjoy your meal. Twice.
Told the printer to try harder. It did not.
Submitted the wrong file. Twice. Same file.
Missed a stand-up that was cancelled. Nobody told me it was back.
Replied-all to an email about lunch. Three times.
Deleted the wrong environment. The right one was also wrong.
Asked a question answered in the subject line. Of the email I sent.
Named a file "final_v3_ACTUAL_final2". It was not final.
Apologised to a door. The door was automatic.
Scheduled a meeting to discuss the meeting we cancelled.
Sent my therapist a work Slack by mistake. She replied professionally.
Pricing
Pay for things that don't work.
Every tier is the same. The price is different. That's the whole model.
Free
You get nothing and you will enjoy it.
- ✓Full access to all wrong information
- ✓100 credits that mean nothing
- ✓Pet rock with no distinguishing features
- ✓Horoscopes from a deceased pigeon
- ✓The Nothing Button
- ✓Gary, in the background, always
Pointless Plus
Everything from Free, now with guilt.
- ✓Same features as Free
- ✓A badge that says 'Pointless Plus'
- ✓Priority access to wrong answers
- ✓Kevin monitors your account personally
- ✓Reginald sends you a leaf
- ✓Achievements nobody wanted
Even Stupider
You paid more. The AI got dumber. You're welcome.
- ✓Everything from Pointless Plus
- ✓A dumber AI (we had to work for this)
- ✓Badge: 'Paid To Make It Worse'
- ✓Exclusive wrong answers, wronger
- ✓Gary sends you a personally confusing email
- ✓Pigeon Nostradamus predicts your week (badly)
Enterprise
For companies that need to waste money professionally.
- ✓Everything from Even Stupider
- ✓A dedicated account manager named Gary
- ✓Custom wrong answers for your industry
- ✓Reginald attends your board meetings (virtually)
- ✓Quarterly nothing reports
- ✓Kevin reviews your spreadsheets (he is on leave)
All plans include unlimited access to wrong answers. No refunds. Not because we're greedy. Because Gary handles refunds and Gary is unavailable.
Annual recognition
The Seven Blunders
of the World
Crowned every year. Never removed.
Useless resources.
Beautifully made.
Six guides you didn't know you needed. You still don't. Free to keep forever.
Like regret.
Anti-Marketing Plan for Business
The only strategy guide that guarantees nothing.
Six-step framework covering your enemy (the customer), the wrong audience, budget allocation, the message, success metrics (feelings), and the call to action (a shrug).
Self No-Help Guide
Bestselling advice from someone who also has no idea.
Morning routine, journaling, affirmations, networking, goal setting, and an evening routine that ends in toast. A complete system for staying exactly where you are.
Money Mismanagement Guide
A complete financial framework built on vibes and despair.
Income, expenses, the budget document you open once, the investment strategy you will regret, an empty emergency fund, and a retirement plan that simply says: keep working.
Official Employee Handbook
For staff who don't exist, from management that doesn't help.
Job description (unclear), KPIs (vibes per quarter), leave policy, performance review, code of conduct (don't), and offboarding instructions for someone who was never really here.
Terrible Recipes: A Cookbook of Regret
Technically food. Probably fine.
Toast (advanced), Pasta of Unknown Origin, and The Emergency Meal. Three recipes built on confidence and zero technique. Includes a nutrition panel where every value is yes.
The Résumé Template
Get the job you don't deserve.
Objective (employment, ideally indoors), skills (breathing, blinking, arriving), work experience (stuff happened), achievements (fixed the printer once), and references: Clive. Just Clive.
No email required. No strings attached. No reason to download these, honestly.
You've been here for four minutes.
That's four minutes you didn't spend thinking about anything important.
Sign up. Get 100 credits. Lose them immediately.
Or keep using the site. We truly don't mind.
SUPPORT
Frequently Asked Questions.
You had questions. We had answers. They are not related to each other but they are both here.
40 questions answered. Satisfaction rate: pending review by Kevin. Kevin is still running.